The Power of “Will You Forgive Me?”

By Pastor Ryan | Posted October 18, 2007

The other day, while washing my car, my daughter approached me and asked if she could help. Pleased, I gave her a rag and she went to work alongside me. There we were my daughter and I, scrubbing together! It is moments like these that you live for as a dad. Well the moment didn't last long. As with most 4 year olds, she quickly fizzled out and began playing in the driveway with her brand new extra large bottle of bubbles. All was well.

After a few minutes my daughter emerged from behind the car and requested a new bottle of bubbles. Not attempting to veil my irritation I asked her where the brand new bottle disappeared to?

Pointing to a large iridescent soap slick on the driveway she responded in an innocent tone, "I poured it on the ground." I looked at her with Daddy distain and sharply replied, "Why did you pour the bubbles out on the ground? Don't you know that is wasteful?" At this point I commenced with a passionate, well constructed lecture about how as Christians we do not waste things. You would have been impressed. You can well imagine what happened next. Tears welled up in her big blue eyes and she began to cry. Satisfied that my daughter had learned her lesson, I went back to scrubbing the windshield on my car.

That night as I tucked her into bed, the Holy Spirit began speaking to me about the way I handled things earlier that day. He brought Ephesians 6:4 to my remembrance, "Fathers do not provoke your children to wrath." While sitting next to my daughter's bed I realized that I had unleashed the full power of my frustrations over a mere 99 cents. Then and there I decided that at four years old, my daughter did not need to be burdened with concerns about wastefulness. I want her to enjoy life, explore, discover and create. In time she will learn the importance of conservation but now I want her to be a child without unnecessary cares. Sometimes, as a parent, our reaction doesn't fit the misdeed.

As we finished praying, I looked at her in the eyes and gently said, "Emma will you forgive Daddy? I was wrong in the way I talked to you and I am very sorry for what I said. Daddy loves you and I know you where just playing. You don't need to worry about wasting things right now. Will you forgive me?" Then rapping my arms around her she said without giving it a second thought, "Yes Dada I forgive you, I love you so much. It's okay."

As parents we all want our children to honor us, so we do our best to instill within them respect for authority and trust in our leadership. There is an old adage, "Daddy knows best." But what happens when he doesn't? Instead of covering up our mistakes for fear our kids will disrespect us, we must learn to ask forgiveness. Let's not be afraid to admit we are not perfect. We teach the power of forgiveness best, by modeling it.

Keys to Parenting

  1. Keep calm
  2. Don't react
  3. Be careful what you say- Words can not be taken back
  4. Ask forgiveness immediately, healing the relationship quickly